BACKlikeWEneverLEFT

After a very recent and deep conversion with my brother from another, I felt it was time to return in full force. We were discussing a random scene of events that recently transpired, which had us both messed up in the head.  Due to the nature of the beast, we won’t go into much details; however what we can discuss if the fact that BOTH parents are needed to raise a child.  So on that note this is where the story begins.

Many arguments go back and forth about which child son or daughter, lose the most from missing a parent; after several conversations I think both suffer tremendously. So many songs touch on this throughout the course of hip hop. Many artist speak often on having a missing parent (unfortunately normally a father) One very thought-provoking song came from one of my favorites, Jay-Z ft Beanie Sigel- daddy where have you been? There’s a portion where he says “It’s about time we have a father to son, sit down let me tell you ’bout your fatherless sons
how they grew to be men and father they sons
father they daughters
N#%%@, you left a fatherless daughter” . That’s real so many times women are left to father the load, while the male involved has decided to continue his egotistical  life. When it comes to raising a child there are things that both parents have to provide,  unfortunately women can not raise men. Women can raise boys in to being a certain type of male, however there is always going to be something missing. I know first hand the effects of coming up fatherless, my moms did her best to play both roles…. Played it very well I might add, but she couldn’t teach me what to do in my first fight.  She can’t tell me how to respond as a male when you start to hit puberty. Many other things that play a major role in plight from boy to man. It’s things I had to learn on my own, by trial and error. Women can nurture a boy as far as they can go, but you need pops for that tough love. Crazy thing is with sons & dads all he is, is a little you, sons develop pops traits regardless. As I continue into Jay-Z’s  verse, “I wanted to walk just like him,  wanted to talk just like him, often momma said i look too much, and thought just like him…”  The son is becoming a mirror image of that dad, without either realizing.  Now you have males shaping into a man they never even knew, making the same mistakes he made, living the same life he living.  Your ‘PARENTS ‘  are suppose to be there to prevent you from making mistakes they already committed, well how can that happen if somebody missing.  Your mom is drugged up, decided to keep it moving… Now you left with the working pops struggling to keep his job. Well what happens when you the child, decides to dip into the drug life. You don’t have any one to tell you from experience. The situation goes the opposite as well, you the child lives with moms, but pops a dealer, moved heavy weight.  You start to fall into the life, and nobody is there to fully stop you. Moms too busy working to get you through, pops busy being the image you adore.

Females have it just as bad, I’ve been able to learn this as I grew older.  During my childhood, I always felt that the ideal situation would be mother’s to raise daughters and fathers to raise sons. In retrospect I have been able to prove myself wrong, both need to be around for either male or female.  See with young girls growing up, it’s important for them to have a solid male figure in their life who genuinely cares. It’s also important for a mother to raise her daughter into a woman.  The major statement is always mother’s can’t raise men…. Well father’s damn sure can’t raise women. Society often at times over looks single fathers in the world as a real entity.  They do exist and have just as many issues as the single mom. A father can’t teach his daughter how to do her hair, apply make-up, respond to her puberty. He can’t teach her how to conduct herself as a woman in various situations. Women need to be there to intervene, women need to be there for that first heart breaking situation for their daughter.  A father not going to know what to say to console her, he just going to respond… “where this lil boy live at?? Ima go whoop his ass for you princess!!!” I mean that’s great and all  but that’s CLEARLY not the best way to handle that situation.  Mothers can step in and say something warm and comforting, always know the right words to say. Many females

Indubitably it’s evident that two will always be better than one. Not to under-estimate the power of one, but there are valuable features that having both parents bring to a child’s life. Many single parent children come out wonderful and manage to over come adversity, just like many dual parent children come out sub par. I am in no form choosing one side over another, I just want to bring attention to upcoming parents.  Mainly my males, raise your kids. It took two to do it, it requires TWO TO DO IT.  Keep that in mind good people. People also need to understand, just because that relationship between the mother and father is damaged, does not mean the relationship between parent and child has to be.  Far too often couples end things with each other, leaving the kid in the wind.  Ladies allow that guy to be a father, establish a working relationship between each other for that child. Guys stop forgetting you have kids, you did the actions… MAN UP!!! For those of you who are making it work, my applause to you, encourage somebody else to walk in your shoes.  We need to stop allowing media play parents to our upcoming youth. Rise to the occasion, as you did that time of intercourse, and help improve the one’s coming after us….

“There was somethin in this man’s face he knew he seen before
It’s like, lookin in the mirror seeing hisself more mature
And he took it as a sign from the almighty Lord
You know what they say about he who hesitates in war
(What’s that?) He who hesitates is lost
He can’t explain what he saw before his picture went blank
The old man didn’t think he just followed his instinct
Six shots into his kid, out of the gun
N#%%@$ be a father, you’re Killing your son
Six shots into his kid, out of the gun
N#%%@$ be a father, you Killing your sons